This issue is all about Mumma Care. It is something that I have lacked for almost the whole of my parenting journey (William just turned 6!).
Up until last year, I have always operated from my head space, and felt that worthiness and accomplishment is based upon objective outcomes– which for me, look like a well balanced child, clean house, happy husband, successful business (magazine, conferences and expos). But over the last year, I have realised that this is not how worthiness is measured.
I also learned that burnout is real – even when you are doing what you love ~ because I absolutely love creating magazines, conferences and expos! I have gone on a few retreats in the last 12 months (3 to be exact!) – but when I return home, I seem to be getting into the same patterns of busyness and outcome focused activities – resulting in feeling like my bucket is empty quite quickly.
So that is why the theme of this issue is on Mumma Care – hopefully it finally sinks in for me as I have had to read the articles many times!
I will be honest, I thought that getting help from others was for the weak. But really, I think it is quite the opposite. To ask for help one needs to be strong and confident in themselves – which I am still working on.
It takes a strong person to say:
“I’m not coping”
“I need help”
For me, asking someone to look after William so I can have some time made me (internally) look like a failure. But now that is changing. If I don’t look after myself, then how can I expect anyone else to?
So from now on, I’m going to ask for more help. I’m going to take more time for me – not me working, or me spending quality time with anyone else … just me.
Time for a bath. Time for a movie. Time for a meditation. Time for doing NOTHING!
It will be hard hard at first to say the words: “Can you please look after William sometime soon” but I need it. We all need it. Realistically, it will add value to his relationships with these people!
He will not be missing out. I will not be missing out. We will both be gaining out of this.
Now, have a read of the Mumma Care articles and sit down after your kids go to bed and determine what it is you need to feel like you are being cared for.
Make plans to implement it. Keep coming back to it and make sure it is being implemented as us mums, quickly sink back down to the role of doing and being everything for our families!
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Enjoy the gift of Nurture!